Tartar Martyrs

Tartar Martyrs

Willing to give their lives to destroy all things "plaque".

Game hunters should really pay attention to the dangers of underbrushing.

Tartar Martyrs held the coveted title of Current Champ from Monday, May 12, 2008 to Tuesday, May 13, 2008, heartily vanquishing Teddy Slane to earn it. Unfortunately, brutal defeat came soon after, at the merciless hands of The Expiration Dates.

This hero's magnaminous likeness was captured at the moment of glorious triumph by Guest Illustrator Burton Durand.

Audience

Quotes overheard while standing in the crowd that gathered to watch the carnage…

  1. 'Mounted on a plaque' = dental plaque?

    Good lord. That's practically cheating!

    L | [ a ]

  2. I am a big fan of the listerine molotov the one dude is throwing.

    And how terrifying that toothbrush looks.

    ajob223 | [ a ]

  3. Yeah, thank goodness for the comment explaining it because after pulling an all-nighter I totally didn't get it. Sorry. I'm going to take a nap at my desk now.

    solaana | [ a ]

  4. I absolutely LOVE bald flossman!

    he looks so scrappy.

    zman | [ a ]

  5. It was a toss-up between these guys and the "Safari Mad Hatter."

    But once I thought of the mouthwashitov cocktail, I had to go this route.

    burt | [ a ]

  6. Yeah but what happens when Flossman runs out of floss? And why why why, now that I've thought of that, did my mind go right down into the gutter thinking about all sorts of floss-replacement kinkiness that he gets up to? What is wrong with me?

    I like the font though.

    solaana | [ a ]

  7. I'm a little creeped out by the tooth paste tube guy...I think that is one time its ok to squeeze in the middle rather then roll from the bottom.

    That said, bravo Burt for coming from far left field on this one.

    Bain0 | [ a ]

  8. Not the strongest entry; I guess the plaque connection and the "underbrush" pun.

    Goozeoo | [ a ]

  9. This is one of my all-time favorites. I love the random punniness. I love being surprised by the vanquishing heroes! Hooray hooray hooray!

    emperatriz | [ a ]

  10. Brilliant text! I didn't notice the little smiles until my third viewing.

    timothy | [ a ]

  11. Wait... Is that Danny DeVito in the floss?

    netdruid | [ a ]

  12. Great illustration,think the pun is a bit faaaaaaaaaaar fetched though, but I got it! Does that mean... I'm clever??

    Toothpaste dude's hair is perfect!

    opspraak | [ a ]

  13. Haha, it's all for fun.

    So sit back and enjoy the fluoride.

    burt | [ a ]

  14. I'm quite sure that that 'fluoRIDE' pun just crossed the line

    Scott | [ a ]

A Random Hero!

The Competitive Eater

The Competitive Eater

Consumes mass quantities of food in minimal time. He once gurgitated an entire town's worth of Old Country Buffets and made the manager of Sizzler cry.