Monsieur Masseur
Turns panic into pleasure with his magical touch — the C'est la vie Thérapie.
One 5-minute session ($1 per minute) with him and your body turns to mush.
Monsieur Masseur held the coveted title of Current Champ from Monday, March 24, 2008 to Tuesday, March 25, 2008, heartily vanquishing Deadline to earn it. Unfortunately, brutal defeat came soon after, at the merciless hands of Prick.
This hero's magnaminous likeness was captured at the moment of glorious triumph by Guest Illustrator Varick Rosete.
Audience
Quotes overheard while standing in the crowd that gathered to watch the carnage…
A Random Hero!
Jack Rummy
Distracting Grannies from their everyday duties. Minutes will turn to hours and hours into days. Before you know it, Fairy Grandmother will forget to even feed herself.