Vulgar Vulture

Vulgar Vulture

Ignores scavenger etiquette. Like... waiting until something dies before you eat it.

Buzzards everywhere are embarrassed by him. Though, they still accept his dinner invitations.

Vulgar Vulture held the coveted title of Current Champ from Wednesday, August 20, 2008 to Thursday, August 21, 2008, heartily vanquishing The Remainder to earn it. Unfortunately, brutal defeat came soon after, at the merciless hands of Femurder.

This hero's magnaminous likeness was captured at the moment of glorious triumph by Kevin .

Audience

Quotes overheard while standing in the crowd that gathered to watch the carnage…

  1. Well, really! The knife should be held in the left prehensile wing! How improper.

    L | [ a ]

  2. Apparently there's something about a vulture with a low, sloping forehead that I find hilarious.
    It's like he's a vulture, but he's also a Neanderthal, but he's smart enough to use silverware, but he's dumb enough that he's holding the knife with the blade pointed toward himself. Oh, sweet juxtaposition!

    Ometiklon | [ a ]

  3. L, dining etiquette states that knives go on the right, forks on the left, as pictured. But those rules may only apply to humans. Or things with hands. Or things with utensils.

    Very nicely done, Kevin!
    Wonderful hand-type.

    burt | [ a ]

  4. Soon to be defeated by ken-tuckyfry?

    Chris | [ a ]

  5. Mmmm, chicken, turkey...vultures. This sounds like a job for the Deep Friar. Ha!

    bettsmedia | [ a ]

  6. Now now kids... Wait until the next hero is posted before you give your suggestions.

    Robert | [ a ]

  7. Indeed a worthy foe. In my country we used to have a columnist who became famous for her writings on etiquette. She became known as Emsie Etiquette and is still the fear of many an open mouth eating young child. I do believe her heart will sorely stop should she be faced with this... this... Vulgar Vulture!

    opspraak | [ a ]

  8. Is it just me, or is there a beautiful double pun again?

    While the vulgar vulture is taking care of our pretending-to-be-dead remainder, if I remember my math right, the reason there was is a remainder in the first place is because we would have dealt with a *vulgar* fraction.

    This in turn makes me wonder if a vulgar falcon could have worked too but alas falcons go after alive and kicking prey.

    leo | [ a ]

  9. I was just tipped off about this site by a friend...and it totally destroyed my workday. Absolutely brilliant. How do you keep coming up with this stuff at such a rate...? The Vulgar Vulture is possibly my favourite so far...It's so exquisitely far-fetched....

    Aron | [ a ]

  10. Thanks, Aron! Our current pace is much slower than when we started out - matt and I were doing 1 a day each. Now we do one every other day, and really it's not too bad, once you get in the habit.

    bearskinrug | [ a ]

  11. I love the justification in case of confusion.

    Daniel | [ a ]

A Random Hero!

Puberteam

Puberteam

Changing anything comfortable or good to just plain awkward. The Boys will be a lot less popular with hits such as "Pop it, girl (my backne)" and "Baby, I stink after gym class, baby"